Thank you JAYSUS! It's Friday... which means that this is the last day of the week I have to hear ol' brainless to the right say things like "Uhhhhhh and Oohhhhhh" anytime anyone asks her something. This girl seriously sounds like Fran Drescher and its killing me - every day a little piece of me dies everytime I hear her stupidity. She just sucked me into the S-hole  for like 10 minutes about how much she loves my diet. I recently had a very unflattering picture of me eternalized online on my place of business's new website. I look like a fucking lunchbox (thanks for not doing my any favors you shitty photographer). I have been dieting ever since because i'm vain like that, well that and because I am attending a pool party on Sunday so I want to look good in a swimsuit.

Travis reccomended I watch Bridesmaids last night since there is a scene of a girl shitting in a sink, he thought it would be right up my alley. I have to admit..it was pretty funny. Im not gonna lie, it totally made me miss having a close girl friend. Oh well... I always got the booze and my gays.  I would  suggest anyone who likes gross watch that movie.

PS.
I want/need this for days like today.

My poor punkie pie after surgery.

Talk TAlk TALK

Felt the need to brag about your little conquest did ya? You obviously haven't learned that if you say something about someone more than likely it's going to get back to them.

At the end of the day we all make mistakes......very embarrassing ones at that...And that's exactly what that was. A very embarrassing alcohol fueled mistake.

Oh Dear

I party often with my co-workers, some more than others for reasons listed below.


Friday-7 people, 4 bottles of wine, 2 bottles of vodka, a case of beer, and a bottle of pastise.


5 of us could handle our liquor, one passed out, the other was found pantless pissing on the carpet in a spare bedroom on top of the passed out one.

This in addition to the questionable pictures I took made for a very interesting Monday.

On a sad note...I'm missing fucking Danzig tonight...I'll be home all night wishing I was at smelly SaltAir with a bunch of smellier metal heads. Ol Glen will never be as good as he once was though, that's right, I said it. Don't even act like you weren't thinking it.

Really dude....

Of all the days I have ever wanted to throat punch you - today was the worst. YOU....who sits there in your overpriced affliction listening to music all day. You realize your job is to talk on the phone to people right? Maybe you aren't quite grasping the full scope of your job after the full YEAR you have had it. It's ok.

I know you're too busy spraying on your Axe and lotioning your tender little hands to give a shit about anything other than your Bob Marley calendar (Please smoke weed so there is a plausible reason for your behavior) but really man......give me a break. If one more of your pissed off suppliers calls me up and verbally rips my asshole out again because your too damn lazy to check and or return your voicemail's....I really don't even know what I will do.

This is why I chain smoke.....because of people like you. I can't take off and go park behind the other office building like you and get high on my breaks...Yeah, that's right. Maybe don't have a giant ass NFL sticker on your car so you can be less conspicuous while getting lit during your work hours? Nope... not me. I'm stuck to smoking my cigarette angrily in the courtyard. That cheap ass spray isn't fooling anyone!

Just sayin.......

Me and Julio down by the schoolyard

This is how I spend my Wednesday.....3 bottles of vodka later...

1 wolf moon

My furnace has been broken since Friday. My landlord has had 2 people come look at it and here I am on Sunday freezing my ass off and there is no ETA on when it should be fixed. I have some really epic pictures to post about this amazing encounter I had this weekend. It involves a Coors light shirt, jean shorts, and a fucking tattoo of a wolf howling at a moon with a bear in it. This actually happened.